Double WIPpet Wednesday

I think I’m officially done tinkering with the layout and theme of the blog for awhile. I might add a header later on, and maybe another widget or two, but aside from that, I am really happy with how things look right now.

Unless WordPress comes up with more free themes – then I’ll be doomed to tinker once more.

Last week, KL Schwengel (she who leads the WIPpet Wednesday charge) posted about how her muse just threw this new idea at her because of this song. Well, my muse decided to do the same thing to me on Thursday. It reminded me that I had this fanfic I hadn’t worked on in a month or so, and came up with a very good way to rework that fanfic into an original project. It then proceeded to throw a whole bunch of scenes at me. I tried to refuse. I really did. Between work, a new job I’m in the process of interviewing for, my son’s doctor’s appointments, and my other projects, I just do not have enough time for one more thing.

Muses don’t care about real life though.

Anywho, because my muse just refused to let this thing go, I spent most of Thursday, Friday, and Saturday writing down everything. The words were just flowing, and flowing, flowing. Before I knew it, I was 3000 words in, then 5000 words, then 10000. By the time I finally finished, and my creative well had run dry, I was shaking.

Too bad it’s all scenes for book two, but even if this never gets off the ground, it was a wonderful experience!

The fanfic this is being adapted from is Between Two Worlds, so a lot of the character names are the same. However, the story line has changed a bit – instead of being a Harper from Pern who ends up on Earth, it’s now a wizard who ends up in our time and eventually falls in love with a single mom. Bad things happen, and he disappears at the end of book one and is presumed dead. In book two, Marcus and his mom end up living with his grandmother, who really isn’t the nicest person in the world. She sends her daughter off to a mental institution for treatment. Marcus isn’t handling things well, and when his bratty cousin calls his mom crazy, he attacks him. This scene takes place shortly after the fight:

“Something has to be done about him,” His aunt murmured as she hugged her son close. His eye was swollen shut and there was a cut on his head from the beating Marcus had given him earlier. “Just look at what he did to Vance! He’s out of control!”

“I know, I know. But what?”

“There’s a military school near our house, we can always send him there.”

“I won’t deny it would do the boy good to have a little structure in his life,” His uncle chimed in. “But you know she’s just going to pull him out when she’s released.”

“If she keeps acting the way she is, she won’t be released any time soon.”

“I don’t know,” His grandmother sighed. “There’s some discussion about doing electric shock therapy.”

“What?!” His Aunt gasped.

“You want her to get better don’t you? To stop having these delusions.”

“Of course, but is that really necessary?”

“Her doctor assures me that it’s perfectly safe. And since she refuses to take any of her medications… well… desperate times call for desperate measures.”

Marcus leaned against the wall of the hallway, biting his lip in an attempt to keep himself from yelling. How had things ended up like this? If only they had never had to leave Pembroke. If only his grandmother would believe him. If only there was some way to prove to them all that Gareth was real…

His thoughts came to a sudden stop. That was it! That was the solution! He just needed to prove that Gareth was real and they were telling the truth! Then they’d let his mom go and they could be one big happy family again!

However, the only way to prove the wizard was real was to summon him. His grandmother had burned all of his books after his mom had been taken away, but he had managed to save one and hide it. In it, Gareth, the Wizard King, had to travel to Numar to ask for help. Only snippets of the incantation had been included in the novel’s text, but maybe between that and the symbols Gareth had taught him, there might be enough to recreate the spell.

He only hoped he didn’t accidentally call forth a warg-demon from the thirteenth gate in the process.

In addition to work on this new project, I also started editing my other fanfic again. There was a scene that spanned four chapters that has been bugging me ever since I first wrote it many years ago. What happened just wasn’t plausible, and a lot of the dialogue was very circular and repetitive. I finally went through and rewrote that scene and condensed things and cut out a lot of the dialogue. The story feels ten pounds lighter now, and I hope the readers of that fanfic are just as happy with the changes as I am.

And now for the true WIPpet snippet!

Wait you thought that little scene above was the snippet?


Anywho, since today is the 24th, here are 8 paragraphs from chapter 2 of the Descendants (2+2+4=8). Vivian has gotten cleaned up and rejoined the wedding party in time for the rehearsal.

Forty minutes later, Vivian emerged from the hotel room and took the elevator back down to the hotel lobby. The rest of the wedding party milled around outside of the chapel, chatting and sipping on drinks from the bar. She tried to slip in amongst them unnoticed, but her plan was quickly thwarted someone behind her decided it was a good idea to tickle her sides. She yelped in surprise, jumping to one side to escape the attack. The conversation around her immediately died, and Vivian flushed as everyone turned to stare at her. Felicity’s glare was especially potent.

Great. Vivian sighed. She was going to get an earful later.

“Sorry, kiddo.” Her attacker apologized. She turned to find Michael, her dad’s best friend, standing behind her. “Man, your dad is really marrying into a family of uptight pricks. Wonder how long it’ll last.”

“Shush, she might hear you and try to skin you alive.”

“I’d like to see her try. This old skin of mine is pretty tough.” He smiled down at her. “You look beautiful darling.”

“Thanks.” A part of her had been tempted to put on the outfit she had picked out – after all, she would be heading back to the flower shop after this – but at the last minute she had decided to wear the dress Felicity had bought for her. She had even put on make up, brushed out her bangs, and put her hair up into a bun. “You don’t look so bad yourself.” Vivian smiled. He had put on a suit for the occasion, and pulled his salt and pepper hair into a ponytail at the back of his neck.

“All the boys are going to be jealous of me tomorrow. I’m going to have to beat them off with a stick.”

Vivian highly doubted that. Even if she was interested in dating, she doubted anyone here would even look twice at her. Felicity’s friends and family were all rich lawyers or executives – in fact, her brother was the owner of the hotel they were getting married in – and their children’s noses were either stuck too high in the air or constantly lit by the glow of their phones to notice the world around them. They wouldn’t date a mechanics daughter any sooner than she would kiss a frog.

Vivian is being a bit classist there, but soon this silly wedding will be the least of her concerns.

I’m really grateful for all the advice I received last week. It helped out a lot, and I look forward to putting it to good use when I edit. If my silly muse ever lets me get there!

To read more WIPpet Wednesdays, go here.

16 thoughts on “Double WIPpet Wednesday

  1. ReGi McClain says:

    *cringe* So, worked in psych. hospital for three years. To my knowledge, we never shocked anybody. Maybe it’s still used somewhere??? For the most part, we use medicine, counseling, and if the case is THAT extreme, 24-hour one-on-one monitoring. (And when I say THAT extreme, the patient I’m thinking of had 5 personalities, one of which was a self-burner, and spent a lot of time sitting in a large cardboard box.) Other than that, I like the snippet. 🙂

    And I like the little slice of Vivian with her dad’s bestie. He’s a good foil for Felicity. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • ceeleeolson says:

      Yeah, from the little research I did for another story it’s REALLY brutal. However, when I get done with my other projects and actually have a chance to focus on this story again, I’ll have more time to look up a better alternative that’s not so extreme.


  2. Abigail Erynne says:

    I’m with ReGi on this one – the shock therapy isn’t likely. There is something like neurofeedback, but that’s painless. Intensive drug therapy can be a threat, though, especially if she’s actually healthy, as it can be damaging. However, totally agree that that’s an editing issue! Just throwing the suggestion out. And having said that…. WAH. I hope Marcus is successful! That snippet had me cringing!

    Second snippet: I love this interaction! Great dialogue, I immediately got a sense of Michael’s character. Great hook, too. “They wouldn’t date a mechanics daughter any sooner than she would kiss a frog.” Heh.

    FINALLY: Awesome news on the muse-inspired writing streak! It’s almost never convenient, but STILL! That’s the sort of thing we writers live for! (My turn now, right?)

    Liked by 1 person

    • ceeleeolson says:

      Yeah. There’s a lot of different ways I can go with this. I’m kinda leaning towards her prescribed a drug, her not taking it because she’s honestly just fine (well, as much as you can when your family betrays you like that), and the doctors stepping in to inject her with something to sedate her – only her doctor isn’t who he says he is, and what he gives her would do a lot more than just sedate her.

      We’ll see next week if Marcus is successful – I plan on doing double WIPpets for awhile because… well… I haven’t an idea that I have been this excited about in awhile. Don’t get me wrong, I love all my stories, but this one makes me feel like I’m still in high school, passing pages to my friends as soon as I write them 😉

      As for The Descendants – Michael is probably one of my favorite characters in that series. He’s just very relaxed and mellow. I totally picture him as an older The Dude.


  3. Pax Asteriae says:

    Love both your snippets there! I felt so sorry for Marcus–and I don’t blame him for going for his cousin either. Sounds like he has a plan though, or the start of one, so I’m looking forward to seeing where it goes.

    I laughed out loud at “Man, your dad is really marrying into a family of uptight pricks” too and accidentally startled the parrot. Poor Vivian, those kinds of functions are hell at the best of times… (I’m not sure she’s being all *that* classist though, haha… Sounds a bit like parts of my family…) But after what you say about “the least of her concerns” I’m even more intrigued and can’t wait to find out more.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. kathils says:

    “He only hoped he didn’t accidentally call forth a warg-demon from the thirteenth gate in the process.” And yet, if he did that, people might start believing him and his mother. Just saying.

    I love the actual WIPpet. I think I like her dad’s friend as well. For some reason I’m thinking Anson Mount. Might have to do with the whole salt and pepper pony tail thing.

    Liked by 1 person

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