I often fall prey to this idea or feeling that if I just have the right pair of shoes, the right shirt, or the right nail color, that somehow things will just be better. I will be noticed by the right people. I will be more successful. And life will just be perfect. I’m sure there’s probably a proper medical term for this feeling, because I know I’m not the only one that has encountered it, but I’m not aware of what it is at the moment (if you do, please feel free to comment and let me know).

This isn’t a new thing though. It’s something that I remember experiencing as a child. I distinctly remember thinking that if I had the right shoes (specifically those beige construction boots that were all the rage in the 90s) and a cool mini back pack, I would be more popular.

Thankfully, I’ve learned to ignore it as an adult. I’ve learned to get what makes me happy. But sometimes it’ll still creep up and smack me in the head.

For instance, this past week I’ve found myself wondering if maybe my books looked better, they would sell more. In reality it’s an advertising issue, in that I don’t promote enough – not a formatting one. However, the feeling won’t be denied.

Let’s face it, while you can use Word to format ebooks and paperbacks, it has it’s…. quirks. Like putting footers where you didn’t want there to be footers. And then deleting all the footers when you ask it to delete just the one random footer. Creating Drop Caps is also an issue since they never seem to line up just right. There’s also the mysterious page issue, where in the middle of tweaking things, random blank pages will show up out of no where.

While I could use Scrivner to fix these issues, I’m not a big fan of Scrivner. It’s not that it’s a bad program, it’s just not my favorite. It can take some time to learn, and when you have a three year old running around who is determined to do ALL THE THINGS RIGHT NOW, you don’t really have a whole lot of time.

Instead, I really want to give Vellum a try. I’ve heard good things about it. I like how books published with Vellum look.

Unfortunately Vellum is only available on Macs. And while there are ways to get around that… well… they can be quite expensive in the long run. It’s honestly cheaper to buy a Mac.

Which is what I did. I went on Ebay. Found a cheap Macbook that’s fairly easy to repair, and bought it.

And of course the minute I did, the sensation of NO YOU NEED THIS TO BE MORE SUCCESSFUL immediately faded and I was left wondering what the hell I just did.

Thankfully, the secondhand Macbook was affordable and within our budget. It’s not like I’m out hundreds of dollars (Heck, I’m not even out a hundred bucks. That sucker was cheap!) but that was definitely money that could have been put towards more useful endeavors. Like advertising and promotion or buying paperback copies to sell at the local book store.

Moral of the story; think long and hard before hitting that place bid button.